Eulogy for dad: two full examples, a short version and a template

• His work and what it meant to him: the job, the business, the service, the craft.
• The things he did with his hands: fixing, building, cooking, coaching.
• His sayings and his jokes, especially the bad ones.
• How he showed love: usually in actions more than words.
• The places he loved: the lake, the ballpark, the porch.
• One gentle quirk: the thermostat, the maps, the radio station.
• What he taught you, on purpose and by example.

1. Who you are: "I'm Mark, Bill's son."
2. His life in four sentences: where he grew up, his work, his marriage, his children.
3. Story one: the quality everyone knew.
4. Story two: the side of him only family saw.
5. What he leaves: the habit, rule or skill you will carry on.
6. Goodbye, in his words if you can.

This example was written for this guide by the Notre Livre team. The names and details are invented: use the shape, and replace every detail with your own.

"Good afternoon. I'm Jessica, Ray's daughter. Dad would be embarrassed by all this attention, so let's not tell him.

Dad grew up in Scranton, Pennsylvania, the son of a mailman, and became a mailman himself for thirty-three years. He knew every dog on his route by name, and most of the people too. When he retired, his route threw him a party in a cul-de-sac. Some of you organized it. He talked about it for a decade.

Dad was not a big talker. He showed love by doing things. When I got my first apartment, he showed up with a toolbox and spent the weekend fixing every cabinet door, every leaky faucet and every outlet. He didn't say 'I'm proud of you.' He said, 'This place is okay. The water pressure's good.' I knew what he meant.

He had a rule for everything. Never let the gas tank go below a quarter. Always carry a five-dollar bill for emergencies. Check the oil before a long trip. I'm forty-four years old and I still have a five in my wallet. I'll never spend it now.

He was also funny, in a quiet, dry way. When I told him I was getting married, he took a long pause and said, 'Does he know?'

What Dad gave me was steadiness. Whatever happened, he'd be there, with a toolbox and a few words. That's what I want to give my own kids.

Dad, I checked the oil before I drove here. Thanks for everything. We've got it from here."

This example was written for this guide by the Notre Livre team. The names and details are invented: use the shape, and replace every detail with your own.

"I'm Kevin, Joe's oldest. Thank you all for coming.

My father was a high school football coach for twenty-seven years. Many of you here played for him. You know he could be loud on the sideline. What you might not know is that he came home after every game, win or lose, and sat in his truck in the driveway for ten minutes before he came inside. I asked him once what he was doing. He said, 'Leaving the game in the truck.' When he walked through that door, he was just Dad.

He coached me in Little League, and I wasn't good. He never once made me feel it. He'd say, 'Keep your eye on the ball, and keep your chin up.' I've used that advice for job interviews, my wedding and the night my son was born.

Dad believed in second chances. Several of his former players are here today because he gave them one: a ride to school, a job reference, a seat at our dinner table when home wasn't a good place to be.

Dad, I'm going to sit in the truck for ten minutes before I go home today. Then I'll walk in and be the dad you taught me to be. Chin up, everyone."

This example was written for this guide by the Notre Livre team. The names and details are invented: use the shape, and replace every detail with your own.

"I'm Anna, Pete's daughter. Dad loved his family, the Cubs, and a good cup of black coffee, and he was loyal to all three through some very hard seasons. He taught us to work hard, to tell the truth and to always shake hands like we meant it. He fixed everything in our house and most of the things in the neighbors'. Dad, the coffee's on. Thank you for always being there."

"I'm [name], [father's name]'s [son / daughter]. Dad grew up in [place], [one detail]. He [work or service] for [number] years and raised [number] children [with Mom / on his own].

If you knew Dad, you knew [his saying / habit]. I think of [short story].

He was also [quality]. [Short story.]

What he gave me was [what he leaves]. Dad, [goodbye in his words]."

• "He didn't say 'I love you' much. He said 'Did you check the tires?' It meant the same thing."
• "He had a rule for everything, and every one of them turned out to be right."
• "He never missed a game. He just stood at the fence instead of in the stands."
• "He could fix anything except the Cubs' bullpen."
• "He gave second chances the way other people give advice."
• "Wherever I go, I'll still have a five-dollar bill in my wallet."

If your relationship with your father was difficult or distant, you do not have to pretend otherwise. Speak about what was real: the work he did, the things he tried to give, what you learned from him, even if some of it was what not to do. "My father wasn't an easy man, but he showed up for work every single day, and that taught me something" is honest and fair. It is also fine to let someone else speak.

A eulogy holds a life in a few minutes. The memories you gathered for it are often the beginning of something longer. Notre Livre writes the life story of your father as a book of 100 to 250 pages, from the memories you and your family share in a guided conversation with an AI interviewer. Nothing is invented, you review every chapter, and the hardcover is printed in the US ($69 to $119, US shipping included).

Many families give a copy to each grandchild, or read a chapter at the first anniversary. There is no deadline: you can start weeks or months after the funeral, when you are ready.