Ruby wedding anniversary gifts: 12 ideas for 40 years of marriage
By the Notre Livre editorial team · · 6 min read
Forty years is a long time to be married. By now the couple has a house full of things, so the ruby anniversary is less about what you give and more about what it says.
Here are twelve ideas, from the traditional red to presents that tell their story, whether you are buying for your parents or for your own partner.
Ruby and red classics
- A ruby pendant, ring or pair of cufflinks: the traditional gift, and it lasts.
- Forty red roses delivered on the day, one for each year.
- A bottle of red from the year they married, if you can find one.
- A red enamel casserole dish for the one who does the Sunday roast.
Experiences for the two of them
- A return trip to where they honeymooned, or the holiday they always meant to take.
- A family lunch with everyone in the same room, perhaps a surprise.
- A vow renewal, small and informal, with the grandchildren as witnesses.
- Afternoon tea somewhere grand, with a note from each child.
Gifts that tell their story
For a ruby wedding, the most treasured gifts are usually about the forty years themselves.
- A photo book, one page per year, with captions from the family.
- A memory jar filled with notes from friends and relatives.
- Their wedding photo restored and framed beside one taken today.
- Their love story as a real book: see below.
How to choose between them
Start with who is giving. A partner can give something intimate: jewellery, a letter, a trip for two. Children giving to their parents usually do best with something that brings the family together or records the forty years, because that is what parents at this stage tend to value most.
Then think about the budget per person. A group present from three or four siblings can turn a modest amount each into something substantial: a weekend away, a restored wedding film, or a printed book of their story.
Finally, do not worry about getting the red exactly right. Ruby is a starting point, not a rule. A present that shows you know the couple matters far more than the colour of the wrapping paper, and most parents will remember the effort long after they have forgotten the object.
Questions to ask them for the book
- Where did you first meet, and what did you think of each other?
- What was your wedding day really like, including what went wrong?
- What was your first home, and what did it cost?
- Which year was the hardest, and how did you get through it?
- What would you tell a couple getting married today?
Forty years, written as a book
With a Notre Livre anniversary book, one of them tells the story of the marriage in a guided conversation, or a son or daughter interviews them over a few evenings. It becomes a novel of 120 to 200 pages, written in the first person with AI assistance, that the grandchildren will read one day. Nothing is invented, and the family reviews every chapter before printing.
From £29 for the digital edition, £55 or £75 for the hardback, printed in the UK with VAT and delivery included.